Invalidation

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In the book, Nasty People, by Jay Carter, he brilliantly describes the methods of the invalidator.  The many methods they use, “uncertainty; projection; generalization; judgment; manipulation; sneak attack; double message; cutting communication; building you up, cutting you down; and the double bind” are examined and the mechanics of the conflict they cause are examined.

It is the state of uncertainty that I attack here in this moment we have together.  It is in this state that most of us will suffer and pine for an answer.  Get yourself a friend or be your best friend.  Ask them to help you remember, IT IS WHAT IT IS.  Don’t over think it.  Don’t introvert or get in your head.  If you think it- it is so! If it feels bad, it is. If it looks suspect, it is. If you don’t like it, you don’t.  Trust yourself until you know differently.  Self doubt, lack of confidence, and being unsure are symptoms of one thing – it is not that you do not trust others or the world, you do not trust yourself my friend.

Been there.  Done that.  Let’s do this. What if?  What if you trusted in what you think, feel, see, and believe?  What if?  I may be wrong, but I will go down trying. I am true, I am real, I am alive, and I exist.  My presence exists.  My power exists.  I am.  Why be defensive?  Why degrade or defile yourself?  Don’t be ridiculous. It is what it is.  Stand by it.  Stand by what you see and believe.  Take action and be very careful to understand outside threats.

To as many as received Him, to them He gave the power to become.

John 1:12

Become.  Be. Trust and become. You cannot advance without the “power to become” and this comes from within, not from permission from someone or something outside you, as it was written, to thine own self be true  -William Shakespeare

@2017-2021 Kim R. Foster, The Winning Way | All Rights Reserved

Categories: Leadership

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